1. DON’T RUSH TO DIVORCE
– IT HARDLY SOLVES ANY PROBLEM,- GOD HATES DIVORCE MAL 2:15-16 SEEK SOLUTION NOT DESOLUTION
2. BE READY TO CONFRONT THE SITUATION
– DON’T TRY TO RUN AWAY- BE READY TO FIGHT AGAINST BREAK-UP
– YOU ARE POWERFUL PHIL 4; 13 LK 10:19
3. IF THE FOUNDATION OF YOUR MARRIAGE IS WEAK, PRAY FOR THE BLOOD OF JESUS TO ENTER INTO THAT FOUNDATION AND RECONSTRUCT AND STRENGTHEN IT.ISAIAH 54:11
SECONDLY, COMMAND THE FIRE OF GOD TO DESTROY EVIL FOUNDATIONAL POWERS EXPLOITING THE WEAK FOUNDATION IN YOUR MARRIAGE.
4. ATTACK EVIL HABITS THAT BOTH OF YOU MAY HAVE MANIFESTED.
TAKE UP SEVEN DAYS FASTING, ASKING GOD TO HELP YOU AND YOUR PARTNER OVERCOME SUCH HABITS
5. IF BOTH OF YOU ARE INCOMPATIBLE (I.E. HAVING OPPOSING CHARACTERS), DO AS FOLLOWS:-
a. DE-EMPHASIZE YOUR CONFLICT AREAS
b. HIGHLIGHT AREAS OF SIMILARITY.
c. ASK FOR DIVINE WISDOM AND UNDERSTANDING TO LIVE HAPPILY JAMES 1:5
3 COMMUNICATION
– FIRST FORGET YOUR EGO AND PRIDE
– BE WILLING TO LOSE AN ARGUMENT
– AVOID ARGUMENTS AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE
– LEARN WHEN TO RELATE WITH YOUR PARTNER IN LOVE
– DON’T IMMEDIATELY RAISE EMOTIONAL ISSUES,DON’T BE PROVOCATIVE
– IN ANY CASE, PRAY FOR PEACEFUL TALKS BEFORE ANY DISCUSSION
– DON’T BE DISCOURAGED IF YOUR PARTNER REBUFFS YOUR INITIATIVES FOR PEACE
– TRY AGAIN AND AGAIN PRAYERFULLY AND PEACEFULLY, UNTIL IT IS DONE
– DON’T CRITICISE, IT KILLS COMMUNICATION
– DON’T NAG; IT DRIVES AWAY ATMOSPHERE FOR USEFUL DISCUSSIONS
PROV21:9 SAYS IT IS BETTER TO DWELL IN A CORNER OF THE HOUSETOP, THAN WITH A BRAWLING WOMAN IN A WIDE HOUSE.
PROV.21:19 IT IS BETTER TO DWELL IN THE WILDERNESS, THAN WITH A CONTENTIOUS AND AN ANGRY WOMAN.
1PETER:3:1-9
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
1Pe:3:2: While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1Pe:3:3: Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
1Pe:3:4: But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
1Pe:3:5: For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
1Pe:3:6: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
1Pe:3:7: Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
1Pe:3:8: Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
1Pe:3:9: Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing
4 RELATING TO UNSAVED SPOUSE
THE IDEA THAT YOU CAN DIVORCE YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT BORN AGAIN IS TOTALLY UNSCRIPTURAL! 1 COR. 7: 10-16
EXCEPT FOR REPEATED IMMORALITY, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE OR CONSTANT VERBAL ABUSE IN THE HOME YOU ARE NOT GIVEN ANY SCRIPTURAL REASON TO BREAK THAT HOME.
DON`T LISTEN TO THE DEVIL THAT KEEPS TELLING YOU TO DROP HIM OR HER AND CARRY ON WITH JESUS!
YOUR SPOUSE IS NOT YOUR ENEMY. IF THAT IS YOUR THINKING THEN YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR MENTALITY!
ALSO IF ALL YOU WANT IS JUST TO SEE YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE SAVED, JUST SO THAT YOU MAY BE HAPPY, THEN YOU ARE VERY SELFISH! THAT`S PROBABLY WHY YOUR ANSWER TO THAT PRAYER IS DELAYED.
YOU SHOULD BE MORE CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR HUSBANDS OR WIFES SPIRITUAL CONDITION AND ETERNAL DESTINATION
YOUR NEED FOR HAPPINESS IN THIS WORLD IS A SHORT TERM NEED, THOUGH VERY INTENSE AND IMPORTANT TO YOU.
WHENEVER YOU PRAY FOR THE SALVATION OF A LOVED ONE YOU SHOULD ASK YOURSELF, BUT “WHAT IS MY MOTIVE”?
GOD LOVES YOUR SPOUSE AND CHILDREN AND HE WANTS THEM SAVED MORE THAN YOU DO.
GOD HAS INVESTED MUCH MORE IN THEM THAN YOU HAVE
IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO SAVE YOUR SPOUSE OR CHILDREN
IT IS GOD`S JOB AND HE IS WELL ABLE DO TO IT IN HIS WON GOOD TIME.
TRYING TO FORCE THE ISSUE ON YOUR OWN IS FOOLISH
THIS WILL NOT ONLY DAMAGE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM, IT WILL ONLY PUSH THEM FURTHER AWAY FROM GOD.
YOU CAN ONLY LEAD A HORSE TO WATER BUT YOU CAN`T MAKE HIM DRINK.
KNOW YOUR REAL ENEMY
NO MATTER HOW UGLY OR WICKED THE ACTIONS OF YOUR UNSAVED LOVED ONE MAYBE, IT`S NOT THEM YOU ARE FIGHTING AGAINST, IT`S ACTUALLY THE DEVIL. EPH. 6:12
YOU ARE NOT FIGHTING AGAINST FLESH AND BLOOD.
THE BATTLE IS TAKING PLACE IN THE SPIRIT OR IN THE REALM OF THE INVISIBLE.
SINCE SATAN IS THE REAL ENEMY YOUR JOB IS TO ATTACK HIM AND HIS FORCES OF DARKNESS.
2 COR. 4:4 SAYS THEY HAVE BLINDED THE UNBELIEVERS TO THE TRUE CONDITIONS OF THEIR SOULS AND TO THE LIGHT OF THE GOSPEL.
MANY OF US LIKE TO ATTACK SATAN BY WALKING UP AND DOWN THE HOUSE AND QUOTING SCRIPTURES AND SPEAKING IN TONGUES.
THIS IS GOOD, BUT WE NEED MORE KNOWLEDGE AND POSITIVE ACTION. PRAYERS WITHOUT POSITIVE ACTIONS.
OUR FAMILY MEMBERS DISLIKE US AND OUR CHURCHES AND THINK WE ARE CRAZY.
THE BEST WAY TO FIGHT SATAN AND EVICT HIM FROM OUR HOMES IS TO WIN OUR PEOPLE OVER WITH LOVE AND KIND ACTIONS.
WIVES THERE ARE SPECIFIC VERSES TO MAKE YOUR LIFE AFTER 1PET. 3: 1-2 SAYS IT ALL.
YOUR POSITIVE ACTIONS WILL DEFINITELY WIN YOUR HUSBANDS AND CHILDREN TO CHRIST.
PRAY FOR THEM, BIND THE EVIL SPIRITS AND BELIEVE GOD FOR THEIR SALVATION AND DELIVERENCE DO ALL THAT SECRETLY AND IN PRIVATE.
HOW YOU TREAT THEM OPENLY IS WHAT MATTERS.
WIVES LIVE A GOOD LIFE BEFORE YOUR HUSBAND AND BE LOVING.
THEY WILL EVENTUALLY FEEL SO LOVED AND CHERISHED THAT THEY CAN`T HELP BUT TORN TO GOD.
YOUR GOAL SHOULD BE TO LIVE LIKE THE VIRTUOUS WOMAN IN PROV.31
RECOGNIZE THE GOOD THINGS HE DOES AND PRAISE HIS FOR THOSE AND AVOID GOSSIPING WITH OTHERS ABOUT HIM
HE WILL SOON STOP TO COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR CHURCH ATTENDANCE OR ZEAL FOR GOD.
INFACT HE WILL BEGIN TO SUPPORT YOU, HAVING SEEN THE POSITIVE RESULTS OF YOUR GODLY LIFESTYLE.
WITH EACH THOUGHTFUL AND GODLY ACT YOU ACTUALLY DRAW HIM CLOSER AND CLOSER TO GOD.
IN THE SAME WAY, HUSBANDS, YOU CAN WIN YOUR WIVES OVER TO THE LORD BY YOUR GODLY LIFESTYLE. 1TIM. 4:12, JAMES 3:13
MAKE HER FEEL SPECIAL; LOVE HER AS YOU LOVE YOURSELF.
DETERMINE TO BE A GOOD PROVIDER.
ALWAYS BELIEVE THE BEST ABOUT YOUR WIFE.
KEEP YOURSELF LOOKING AND SMELLING NICE LIKE AN ANGEL OF GOD.
NOW THAT YOU ARE BORN AGAIN, BEGIN TO DO THOSE THINGS YOU NEVER DID FOR HER BEFORE.
CLEAN THE HOUSE, SPEND TIME WITH HER AND THE CHILDREN
WHEN SHE BEGINS TO FEEL THAT YOU ARE NOW SPECIAL AND IRRESISTIBLE, SHE IS ACTUALLY A STEP AWAY FROM FINDING OUT ABOUT THE GOD WHO HAS TRANSFORMED YOU.
THIS IS A SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLE THAT NEVER FAILS
THE MORE HONORABLY YOU LIVE, THE MORE GOD`S PRESENCE WILL PENETRATE AND CHANGE YOUR MARRIAGE AND YOUR FAMILY.
THE DEVIL`S POWER IS BROKEN WHEN YOU COMMIT YOURSELF TO OBEYING GOD`S WORD INSPITE OF YOUR SPOUSE`S BEHAVIOR AND SPIRITUAL CONDITION
SATAN CANNOT HAVING AROUND YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES VERY LONG WHEN YOU ACT ON GOD`S WORD AND SUBMIT YOURSELF TO GOD.JAMES. 4:7
REPRESENT CHRIST WELL ESPECIALLY AT HOME
SATAN FLEES WHENEVER WE BEGIN TO ACT LIKE JESUS
2 COR. 5:20 SAYS THAT WE ARE “….AMBASSADORS FOR CHRIST…”
AN AMBASSADOR IS SIMPLY A REPRESENTATIVE ACTING ON BEHALF OF WHOEVER HAS SENT HIM.
AN EFFECTIVE AMBASSADOR MUST CARRY HIMSELF LIKE THE PRESIDENT WHO SENDS HIM TO A FOREIGN COUNTRY, EVEN THOUGH HE IS NOT THE PRESIDENT.
AS A BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT YOU REPRESENT THE KING OF KINGS.
BECAUSE YOU ARE AN AMBASSADOR OF CHRIST THE ANOINTED ONE, YOU ALSO REPRESENT HIS ANOINTING.
THAT MEANS YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO OPERATE IN HIS ANOINTING, HIS BURDEN – REMOVING YOKE – DESTROYING POWER, EVEN AND ESPECIALLY IN YOUR HOME.
YOU NEED TO RELEASE YOUR FAITH AND EXPECT CHANGES TO TAKE PLACE AS YOU PRAY AND OPERATE THAT ANOINTING IN YOUR CONFESSIONS AND ACTIONS
AS A REPRESENTATIVE OF CHRIST YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS YOU TO DEMONSTRATE WHO CHRIST IS TO HIM OR HER.
PREACHING OR QUARRELING WON`T HELP!
YOUR SPOUSE AND CHILDREN NEED TO SEE THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS IS REAL NOT FAKE.
THEY NEED TO SEE THAT JESUS TRULY LIVES IN YOU.
EACH TIME YOU ARE FACED WITH A DIFFICULT SITUATION, JUST REMEMBER TO ASK YOURSELF “WHAT JESUS DO?”
ANSWER THE QUESTION AND THE SPIRIT LEADS AND THEN CARRY YOURSELF IN THE SAME WAY
1PETER 3:3 IS CLEARLY STATING THAT IT TAKES MORE THAN LOOKING GOOD PHYSICALLY TO KEEP YOUR HOME OR ATTRACT YOUR SPOUSE TO GOD
IT WILL TAKE BOTH INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL BEAUTY TO PLEASE HIM OR HER
SOMEONE CAN LOOK GOOD PHYSICALLY AND TURN OUT TO BE PROUD, ARROGANT, ILL-MANNERED SELFISH AND CONDESCENDING PERSON
WHAT`S INSIDE A PERSON AFFECTS THE OUTSIDE
OUR CHARACTER CAN EITHER ATTRACT PEOPLE OR TURN THEM OFF.
WORK ON YOUR INWARD BEAUTY AS WELL AS ON YOUR OUTWARD BEAUTY
EPH.5:33 SAYS THAT A HUSBAND IS TO LOVE HIS WIFE AS HIMSELF, BUT IT ALSO SAYS THAT THE WIFE SHOULD SEE THAT SHE RESPECTS HER HUSBAND.
THE KEY HERE IS MUTUAL LOVE AND RESPECT FOR EACH OTHER.
IT IS ONE THING TO BE DISRESPECTED AT WORK BUT QUITE ANOTHER IN OUR HOMES.
YOUR HOUSE SHOULD BE YOUR REFUGE YOUR SANCTUARY
THEREFORE SPOUSES SHOULD WORK HARD AT RESPECTING ONE ANOTHER AT HOME.
IF YOU DON`T SHOW YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE THE RESPECT THEY NEED, THEN DON`T EXPECT ANYTHING FROM THEM BY WAY OF CHANGE.
RESPECT EACH OTHER WITH WORDS; BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY ESPECIALLY WHEN ANGRY.
DON`T MAY THE HOLY SPIRIT AND BRING BONDAGE INTO YOUR HOMES BY FORCING YOUR PEOPLE TO PRAY READ THE BIBLE OR GO TO CHURCH.
THEY WILL SURELY RESIST YOU. JESUS TEACHES LIBERTY.
GOD HAS THE EXACT TIME AND PLAN IN HANDS FOR YOUR LOVED ONES SALVATION
JUST PLAY YOUR PART AND LET GOD PLAY HIS OWN.
BE CONSISTENT, CONTINUE TO DO WHAT YOU KNOW GOD WANTS YOU TO DO EVEN WHEN YOU DON`T WANT TO.
AND YOU WILL HAVE MANY OPPORTUNITIES TO SIMPLY STOP.
BUT CONSISTENCY IS THE NAME OF THE KEY TO YOUR BREAKTHROUGH!
RESPECT YOUR MATE ENOUGH TO ALLOW GOD TO DRAW HIM
IT MAY NOT BE EASY ESPECIALLY IF HE OR SHE IS NOT TREATING YOU WELL.
BUT REMEMBER GOD WILL HELP YOU.
ALSO REMEMBER THAT YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE FEELS HELPLESS, FRUSTRATED OR EVEN JEALOUS THAT YOU ARE SO DEEPLY IN LOVE AND COMMITTED WITH AN INVISIBLE ALL POWERFUL GOD.
ALL OF A SUDDEN, YOU ARE BORN AGAIN GOING TO CHURCH, SPENDING TIME IN PRAYER, THE WORD AND OTHER CHILDREN OF GOD.
YOUR SPOUSE FEELS CHEATED. AND NEGLECTED AND TOTALLY PARALYSE
YOU ARE IN LOVES WITH AN INVISIBLE LOVER
BECAUSE CHRISTIANITY OFTEN PRODUCES A POWERFUL RADICAL CHANGE IN AN INDIVIDUALS LIFE, YOUR SPOUSE NEEDS TO KNOW THAT YOU STILL LOVE HIM OR HE
DON`T ALLOW YOUR NEW COVENANT WITH CHRIST AND YOUR ZEAL FOR GOD TO DESTROY YOUR MARRIAGE COVENANT
YOU NEED TO MAKE ROOM FOR SPENDING TIME WITH THEM AND NOT ALLOWING THEM TO FEEL PUSHED AWAY AND DEFEATED.
HOW WOULD YOU DO THIS? ASK THE LORD TO HELP YOU ESTABLISH BOUNDARIES AND PRACTICE TIME MANAGEMENT
THIS IS CALLED LIVING A BALANCE CHRISTIAN LIFE.
BRETHREN THERE ARE NO MAGIC TONGUES OR MIRACLE PRODUCTS TO MAKE UNSAVED LOVED ONES OR SPOUSES COME TO JESUS.
THE TRUTH IS EVEN IF YOU ARE THE WORLD`S GREATEST PRAYER WARRIOR.
THE MOST PERFECT, POLITE AND RESPECTFUL PERSON, THERE IS NO GUARANTEE AT ALL THAT YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE WILL BE SAVED, OR EVER BECOME A CHRISTIAN.
NOTHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR FAITH, CHARACTER OR GOD`S WORD.
IT IS SIMPLY THAT THEY ARE FREE MORAL AGENTS WHO MUST CHOOSE GOD FOR THEMSELVES OR ULTIMATELY REJECT HIM.
THEREFORE THE HOPE OF YOUR MATE`S SALVATION SHOULD NEVER BE YOUR MOTIVATING FACTOR FOR BEING A DEVOTED AND LOVING PARTNER.
YOU SHOULD BE LOVING AND DEVOTED BECAUSE THE LORD COMMANDS IT IN PERIOD.
YOUR ATTITUDE SHOULD BE “I AM GOING TO BE LOYAL, LOVING AND DEVOTED AND SUBMISSIVE TO MY SPOUSE BECAUSE I WANT TO OBEY GOD.
THIS IS ALL ABOUT GOD AND GOD ALONE.
FINALLY RESPOND TO UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, JUST AS THE FATHER RESPONDS TO YOU.
BY DOING SO YOU NOT ONLY TRANSFORM YOUR HEART AND REVOLUTION YOUR MARRIAGE, YOU ULTIMATELY WIN YOUR UNSAVED SPOUSE TO GOD
FINALLY FIND SCRIPTURES THAT MENTION SALVATION AND GOD`S DESIRE FOR PEOPLE TO KNOW HIM INTIMATELY SUCH AS JOHN 3: 15-16, ACTS.2: 37-39 AND 1TIM. 2:1-4
RECITE THEM ALOUD DURING YOUR PRAYER TIME, WITH THE FOLLOWING PRAYERS: (SEE P. 165)
“FATHER, I THANK YOU THAT YOU LOVE ME AND (SPOUSE`S NAME) SO MUCH THAT YOU SENT JESUS TO EARTH TO DIE FOR OUR SINS JOHN 3:16.
YOU DESIRE FOR EVERYONE TO KNOW YOU INTIMATELY AND LIVE WITH YOU FOREVER IN HEAVEN (1TIM. 2:1-4) . BECAUSE OF THAT, I THANK YOU IN ADVANCE THAT (SPOUSE`S NAME) LOVES AND SERVES YOU WHOLEHEARTEDLY.
YOU HAVE RESCUED THEM FROM ETERNITY IN HELL, AND BECAUSE OF THEIR COMMITMENT TO YOU, THEY ENJOY THE GOOD LIFE HERE ON EARTH (JOHN 10 :10)”.
ALSO MAKE IT A POINT TO LOVE YOUR FAMILY
IT`S OK TO LOVE THEM WHETHER THEY ARE SAVED OR NOT. 1 JOHN 4: 20-21
BY ALLOWING CHRIST`S LOVE TO FLOW THROUGH YOU, YOU MAKE IT EASIER FOR YOUR PEOPLE TO DRAW CLOSER TO JESUS!.
5 MONEY MATTERS DEUT.28:1-14
Psalms 35:27Let them shout for joy, and be glad, that favour my righteous cause: yea, let them say continually, Let the LORD be magnified, which hath pleasure in the prosperity of his servant.
Psalms 37:25-26 I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread. He is ever merciful, and lendeth; and his seed is blessed.
Isa:48:16-19 Come ye near unto me, hear ye this; I have not spoken in secret from the beginning; from the time that it was, there am I: and now the Lord GOD, and his Spirit, hath sent me.Thus saith the LORD, thy Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel; I am the LORD thy God which teacheth thee to profit, which leadeth thee by the way that thou shouldest go. O that thou hadst hearkened to my commandments! then had thy peace been as a river, and thy righteousness as the waves of the sea:Thy seed also had been as the sand, and the offspring of thy bowels like the gravel thereof; his name should not have been cut off nor destroyed from before me.
MANAGING HOUSEHOLD FINANCES IS EASY IF WE FOLLOW GOD’S FINANCIAL PLANS FOR OUR LIVES.
MONEY PROBLEMS CAN PLACE MORE STRESS ON A MARRIAGE THAN ANY OTHER OUTSIDE THREAT.
MOST MARITAL ARGUMENTS AND FRUSTRATIONS STEM FROM MONEY.
BOTH RICH AND POOR COUPLES FIGHT OVER HOW TO SPEND, SAVE AND INVEST MONEY.
THEY FIGHT BECAUSE THEY DON`T HAVE THE SAME MOTIVE OR IDEA.
QUITE OFTEN PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY CHRISTIANS ARE QUICK TO BLAME THE DEVIL OR THE COUNTRY`S ECONOMY FOR THEIR FINANCIAL PROBLEMS.
BUT THEY SHOULD RATHER SEE IT AS POOR MANAGEMENT PROBLEMS ON THEIR PART.
MANY DON`T LISTEN TO GOD BEFORE THEY START SPENDING AND MANY DON`T BUDGET.
DEUT.18:18 SOME NEGLECT THEIR SPIRITUAL LIVES IN A BID TO OBTAIN MONEY FOR POWER.
BIBLE SAYS THAT THE LOVE OF MONEY IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVILS. 1 TIM 6:10
PEOPLE BECOME SUICIDAL AND ABUSIVE DUE TO FINANCIAL DIFFICULTIES
MANY BECOME DISHONEST AND BECOME INVOLVED IN EXTORTION AND SHADY DEALS DUE TO THE MONEY PROBLEMS. 1COR.5:9-10; 1COR 6:9-10
MONEY MANAGEMENT IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE LACK OF KNOWLEDGE IN THIS REGARD CAN CAUSE SEVERE SPIRITUAL AND MARITAL DAMAGES
WHAT DOES GOD SAY ABOUT MONEY? IS IT SUPPOSED TO OWN YOU?
IS YOUR WORTH MEASURED BY THE MONEY AND THE POSSESSION YOU HAVE?
WHAT DOES JESUS SAY ABOUT YOUR SOUL AND POSSESSIONS?
HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO MANAGE YOUR FINANCES?
WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU CAN`T AFFORD SOMETHING YOU NEED?
WHAT ARE YOUR FINANCIAL PRIORITIES?
MANAGE YOUR FAMILY BUSINESS PROPERLY
IT IS GOD’S WILL FOR YOU TO OPERATE IN WISDOM AND COMMON SENSE AS FAR AS YOUR FINANCES ARE CONCERNED BEFORE AND WITHIN MARRIAGE.
MOST COUPLES SPEND MORE TIME PLANNING THE DETAILS OF THEIR WEDDING CEREMONIES THAN IN PLANNING THEIR FINANCIAL FUTURE.
YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE MUST SET TIME ASIDE EACH WEEK TO PLAN YOUR FINANCES.
GET AN AGENDA, CALCULATOR, PEN, PENCIL, PAPERS, BILLS AND CHECKBOOKS.
THIS IS YOUR FAMILY BUSINESS, AND YOUR FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT IS IMPORTANT
DON`T SPEND TIME IN ARGUMENT OR FINGER POINTING.
IF THERE IS A PROBLEM, OFFER A SOLUTION AND STAY POSITIVE.
ESTABLISH YOUR FINANCIAL PLAN; AND PLAN TO SAVE, SPEND AND INVEST YOUR MONEY.
PLANNING PROPERLY WILL CERTAINLY ELIMINATE THE NEED FOR ARGUMENTS OVER PURCHASES:
CREATE A BUDGET LUKE 14:28
A BUDGET HELPS YOU “COUNT THE COST” TO SEE WEATHER OR NOT YOU CAN AFFORD TO BUY THE THINGS YOU WANT.
IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HOW MUCH MONEY YOU MAKE
IT SIMPLY SHOWS YOU WHAT YOU HAVE TO WORK WITH AND TELLS YOU WHERE THE MONEY IS GOING BY LISTING YOUR EXPENSES FOR EACH MONTH.
IT SHOWS HOW MUCH IS LEFT AFTER EACH MONEY IS PAID
BUDGETING WILL TELL YOU WHEN IT MAY BE NECESSARY TO ADJUST YOUR LIFESTYLE TO YOUR SALARY
IN OTHER WORDS BUDGETING WILL PREVENT YOU FROM OVERSPENDING AND COMING SHORT.
IT WILL HELP YOU TO SEE THE PROBLEMS BEFORE THEY ARISE.
BUT THE FIRST THING IN ESTABLISHING A BUDGET IS FOR YOU TO PRIORITIZE YOUR OBLIGATIONS:
A )PUT GOD FIRST
YOUR FIRST OBLIGATION IS TITHE AND TO HONOR THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR SUBSTANCE.
WE ARE INSTRUCTED IN MAL 3:10 “BRING YE ALL THE TITHES IN THE STOREHOUSE…..”
SOME PEOPLE ACT AS IF TITHING IS SUCH A BIG THING.
BUT GOD IS ONLY ASKING FOR 10% OF YOUR GROSS INCOME, HE IS LEAVING YOUR WITH THE REST 90%
GOD IS THE ONE WHO GIVES YOU POWER I.E FAVOR, WISDOM, KNOWLEDGE, AND EVEN THE PHYSICAL ENERGY TO GET WEALTH DEUT 8:18
THE JOB YOU HAVE AND THE MONEY YOU BRING HOME ARE BLESSINGS FROM HIM.
HE ONLY REQUIRES A TENTH AND HE DOES NOT TAKE IT WITHOUT GIVING YOU SOMETHING IN RETURN
HE PROMISES TO REBUKE THE DEVOURERS AND TO OPEN THE FLOODGATES OF HEAVEN AND BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY MAL 3:10-11
SOME PEOPLE THINK THEY `LL BE SHORT EACH MONTH IF THEY TITHE BUT YOU ACTUALLY SPEND MORE TIME ENERGY AND MONEY FIGHTING THE DEVOURERS IF YOU DON`T OBEY GOD IN THIS AREA.
B ) ADD IN THE MORTAGE
THE SECOND ITEM LISTED ON YOUR BUDGET SHOULD BE YOUR RENT OR MORTGAGE
DON’T PAY YOUR CAR BEFORE PAYING YOUR HOUSE.
YOU CERTAINLY WOULD NOT LIVE IN A CAR
MAKE SURE THAT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY HAVE AT LEAST A ROOF OVER YOUR HEADS EVEN IF YOU ALL HAVE TO GO AROUND IN TAXIS
C )MAKE SURE YOU ALL EAT
NEXT SHOULD BE YOUR FOOD BUDGET
YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN HAVE TO EAT
PUT FOOD EXPENSES IN TO YOUR BUDGET BEFORE OTHER BILLS.
IF CHILDREN DON`T EAT WELL, THEY WONT FEEL WELL OR PERFORM WELL AT SCHOOL.
ASK THE LORD FOR WISDOM AS YOU GO TO BUY YOUR FOOD
TRANSPORTATION COSTS
NEXT IS TRANSPORTATION, YOU MUST HAVE A WAY OF GETTING TO YOUR WORK.
D ) LIST YOUR UTILITIES
DERTERMINE WHAT YOU PAY ON WATER, ELECTRICITY ETC EVERY MONTH.
ESTIMATE A SLIGHTLY HIGHER FIGURE WHEN ADDING THEM TO YOUR BUDGET.
THAT WAY IF YOUR BILL IS SMALLER THAN WHAT YOU`VE BUDGETED FOR, YOU `LL HAVE SOME EXTRA MONEY.
IF IT`S MORE THAN USUALL, YOU CAN REST ASSURED THE EXPENSE IS COVERED.
YOU NEED TO CONSIDER HERE, THE TELEPHONE CABLE AND INTERNET SERVICES.
HOWEVER THESE THINGS ARE LUXURIES THAT WE MAY HAVE TO TEMPORARILY ELIMINATE FROM OUR BUDGETS WHENEVER NECESSARY.
E )CONSIDER CLOTHING BUDGET ALSO
AFTER THESE NECESSITIES, GIVE YOURSELF SOME ALLOWANCE FOR CLOTHING.
YOU DON`T HAVE TO HAVE SOME THING NEW EACH WEEK.
IF YOU ONLY HAVE A FEW CLOTHES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE ALWAYS CLEAN AND WELL IRONED.
THERE ARE MANY ACCESSORIES YOU CAN ADD THAT CAN MAKE ANY OUTFIT LOOK NEW OR DIFFERENT EACH TIME
IT IS ALSO O.K. TO THINK OF EATING IN A RESTAURANT ONCE IN A WHILE.
F )INCLUDE TAKING YOUR CHILDREN IN A BUDGET
IT IS GOOD TO INCLUDE SOME PERSONAL NO QUESTIONS ASKED MONEY.
IT IS ALSO WISE TO OPENLY AGREE WITH EACH OTHER ON CHILD SUPPORT FOR THOSE CHILDREN OUT THERE, FOR YOUR OWN CHILDREN TOGETHER TO BE BLESSED.
G )SAVE AND INVEST
IT `S IMPORTANT TO HAVE A SAVINGS ACCOUNT.
DOING SO PLANS A HEAD FOR LIFE`S LITTLE SURPRISES SUCH AS A NEW BABY, UNEMPLOYMENT OR A MEDICAL EMERGENCY.
DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO PUT SOMETHING IN TO YOUR SAVINGS ACCOUNT EACH PAY PERIOD.
IF YOU DON`T HAVE THAT EXTRA NOW, GET A GOAL TO GET THERE.
THE BANK GIVES YOU INTEREST ON YOUR SAVINGS ACCOUNT SO IT`S QUITE GOOD TO SAVE.
THE DISCIPLINE MAY SEEM HARD INITIALLY, BUT WHEN YOU NEED THE EXTRA MONEY YOU`LL BE GLAD YOU DID
H )NEVER INVEST IN A COMPANY YOU HAVE NOT TAKEN TIME TO INVESTIGATE AND SEEK GOOD COUNSEL BEFORE YOU INVEST.
ANOTHER WAY OF INVESTING IS BY GIVING TO A MINISTRY OR TO A NEEDY CHRISTIAN.
BE HOWEVER SURE YOU ARE LED BY THE SPIRIT
HE WILL SHOW YOU WHO AND WHERE TO INVEST IN.
FIND OUT IF THE PERSON YOU ARE INVESTING IN IS TITHER OR HAS A MINISTRY.
DON`T INVEST IN PEOPLE WHO DON`T OBEY GOD`S WORD, YOU WILL LOOSE ALL THE BENEFITS
PROV19:17 SAYS THAT IN GIVING TO THE POOR YOU ARE ALSO GIVING TO GOD AND HE WILL REPAY YOU GENEROUSLY, SO LEARN TO GIVE TO THE NEEDY.
I )TO BORROW OR NOT TO BORROW
CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, GOD NEVER SAID IT WAS WRONG TO BORROW MONEY
HOWEVER YOU MUST BE WISE WHEN BORROWING.
MANY PEOPLE ARE COMPLETELY GOVERNED BY CREDIT.
THEY BUY CLOTHES, FURNITURE, AUTOMOBILES, APPLIANCES EVEN FOOD ON CREDIT
BORROWING MONEY BECOMES WRONG WHEN IT COMPLETELY STOPS YOUR CASH FLOW
IT IS WRONG WHEN YOU ARE UP TO YOUR EARS IN DEBT AND YOU HAVE NOTHING WITH WHICH TO PAY BACK.
PS 37:21 SAYS “THE WICKED BORROWETH AND PAYETH NOT AGAIN….”
IF YOU BORROW PAY, PAY IT OFF AS QUICK AS POSSIBLE
THAT IS THE ONLY WAY IT CAN BE DONE SUCCESSFULLY WITHOUT BIDING YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY.
WHEN DO YOU BELIEVE GOD`S TIMING IN YOUR SITUATION
YOU MUST HEAR HIM CLEARLY
IF HE TELLS YOU TO WAIT AND BELIEVE HIM FOR A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF MONEY, THEN YOU`LL SENSE THE TIMING AND KNOW IT`S SURELY COMING.
IF YOU`VE SOUGHT THE LORD AND HE ALLOWED YOU TO BORROW THEN HE `LL HELP YOU SETTLE THE DEBT YOU OWE FROM BORROWING.
HEALTHY FAMILY FINANCES REQUIRE WISDOM, TIME AND EFFORT
ORGANIZATION, COMMUNICATION AND COLLABORATION. BETWEEN SPOUSES ARE THE KEY FACTORS.
ANY MAN OR WOMAN WHO DOES NOT COMMUNICATE CLEARLY WITH THE SPOUSE IN FINANCIAL MATTERS DISHONORS HIM OR HER.
YOU MUST BE ACCOUNTABLE TO EACH OTHER.
FINALLY CAREFULLY FIND OUT WHAT GOD`S WORD SAYS ABOUT MONEY MANAGEMENT
ONLY HIS WORD CAN TURN YOUR FINANCIAL SITUATION AROUND FOR THE BETTER.1COR4:2
7. FAMILY ALTAR.
IT IS A MUST. IT IS A POWERFUL WEAPON AGAINST SATAN. PRAY AGAINST:
a. ANTI-MARRIAGE POWERS
b. FINANCIAL TRIALS
c. HUSBAND AND WIFE SNATCHERS
d. BEWITCHMENT DEVICES AGAINST YOUR HOME
e. EVIL COVENANTS AND CURSES THAT BREAK-UP MARRIAGES
f. PRAY FOR PEACE, JOY AND PROSPERITY OF YOUR HOME ALWAYS
g. ALWAYS SOAK YOUR MARRIAGE IN THE BLOOD OF JESUS
8.) BE CAREFUL WHO YOU TALK TO ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE
– FIRST, LEARN TO SETTLE THINGS WITHIN THE MARRIAGE
– IF THAT IS PROVING DIFFICULT, BACK YOUR EFFORTS WITH PRAYERS (YOU CAN SEND IN PRAYER REQUEST TO OUR PRAYER TEAM THE PRAYER WARRIORS) YOUR PRAYERS WILL BE TREATED IN STRICTEST CONFIDENTIALITY
– DON’T RUN TO YOUR PARENTS EACH TIME THERE IS PROBLEM
– TALK TO ONLY SPIRITUALY MATURED, SPIRIT FILLED AND SPIRIT CONTROLLED XTIANS
– SEEK COUNSELLING
– BE CAREFUL WHO YOU DISCUSS YOUR PROBLEMS WITH
– THERE ARE TOO MANY UNFRIENDLY FRIENDS
– EVIL ADVISERS – BEWARE OF THEM
9. PERFORMING YOUR MARITAL ROLES
– DON’T LET MONEY CONSCIOUSNESS DOMINATE YOUR MARRIAGE
– LET THE MAN LEAD BY SERVING NOT BY BECOMING AN OPPRESSING WIFE BATTERING,
– SERVE WITH EVERYTHING YOU HAVE
– LET THE WOMAN SUBMIT TO HER HUSBAND.
– BE A BUILDER AND NOT A DESTROYER PROV 14:1
– DON’T BE SELFISH: DON’T SAY MY WIFE IS WORKING SO I WON’T PROVIDE FOR HER
– DON’T CREATE ROOM FOR SUSPICION
– BE TRANSPARENT IN YOUR DUTIES
– DON’T DEPRIVE EACH OTHER OF AFFECTION
FINALLY LET US READ THESE SCRIPTURES
1 PETER 3:10-17
1Pe:3:10: For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
1Pe:3:11: Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
1Pe:3:12: For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1Pe:3:13: And who is he that will harm you, if ye be followers of that which is good?
1Pe:3:14: But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled;
1Pe:3:15: But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:
1Pe:3:16: Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.
1Pe:3:17: For it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.
1 PETER 4
Forasmuch then as Christ hath suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves likewise with the same mind: for he that hath suffered in the flesh hath ceased from sin;
1Pe:4:2: That he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh to the lusts of men, but to the will of God.
1Pe:4:3: For the time past of our life may suffice us to have wrought the will of the Gentiles, when we walked in lasciviousness, lusts, excess of wine, revellings, banquetings, and abominable idolatries:
1Pe:4:4: Wherein they think it strange that ye run not with them to the same excess of riot, speaking evil of you:
1Pe:4:5: Who shall give account to him that is ready to judge the quick and the dead.
1Pe:4:6: For for this cause was the gospel preached also to them that are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.
1Pe:4:7: But the end of all things is at hand: be ye therefore sober, and watch unto prayer.
1Pe:4:8: And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
1Pe:4:9: Use hospitality one to another without grudging.
1Pe:4:10: As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.
1Pe:4:11: If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.
1Pe:4:12: Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
1Pe:4:13: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
1Pe:4:14: If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.
1Pe:4:15: But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other men’s matters.
1Pe:4:16: Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf.
1Pe:4:17: For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God?
1Pe:4:18: And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear?
1Pe:4:19: Wherefore let them that suffer according to the will of God commit the keeping
of their souls to him in well doing, as unto a faithful Creator.
LET US PRAY
BLESS THE LORD, BECAUSE HE HAS CALLED YOU OUT OF DARKNESS INTO HIS MARVELOUS LIGHT
THANK HIM FOR COUNTING YOU WORTHY TO BE HIS CHILD
FATHER I GIVE YOU PRAISE AND GLORY AS YOU TEACH ME HOW TO HANDLE MARITAL CHALLENGES
FATHER I ASK FOR THE GRACE TO LIVE IN PURITY AND GODLINESS AND HEART HOLINESS IN JESUS NAME
FATHER, BREAK THE POWER OF THE SPIRIT OF LONELINESS IN MY LIFE IN JESUS NAME
OH LORD DELIVER ME FROM ALL PRESSURES IN MY SPIRIT, SOUL AND IN MY BODY IN JESUS NAME
FATHER IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST, PLEASE HEAL ALL THE HURT I MAY BE CARRYING INTO MY MARRIAGE FROM DAMAGED RELATIONSHIPS
FATHER IN JESUS SET ME FREE, FROM ALL GENERATIONAL CURSES RELATING TO MARRIAGE IN JESUS NAME
FATHER IN JESUS NAME, HEAL ME FROM ALL EMOTIONAL PHYSICAL AND SEXUAL HURTS IN JESUS NAME
FATHER PLEASE EXPOSE NEGATIVE ATTITUDES THAT CAN HURT MY MARITAL LIFE
ISAIAH 32:17-18 “And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever. 18: And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation, and in sure dwellings, and in quiet resting places;”
GALATIANS 5:19-22 “Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, 20: Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, 21: Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. 22: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,”
GENESIS 2:18-22 “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.19: And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.20: And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.21: And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;22: And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.”
GENESIS 1:27-28 “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. 28: And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”
1 PETER 3:8 “: Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:”
EPHESIANS 5: 25-33 “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;26: That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27: That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.28: So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29: For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31: For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32: This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.33: Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
ISAIAH 54:11-13 “O thou afflicted, tossed with tempest, and not comforted, behold, I will lay thy stones with fair colours, and lay thy foundations with sapphires.12: And I will make thy windows of agates, and thy gates of carbuncles, and all thy borders of pleasant stones.13: And all thy children shall be taught of the LORD; and great shall be the peace of thy children.”
ISAIAH 49:24-26 “Shall the prey be taken from the mighty, or the lawful captive delivered? 25: But thus saith the LORD, Even the captives of the mighty shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible shall be delivered: for I will contend with him that contendeth with thee, and I will save thy children.26: And I will feed them that oppress thee with their own flesh; and they shall be drunken with their own blood, as with sweet wine: and all flesh shall know that I the LORD am thy Saviour and thy Redeemer, the mighty One of Jacob.”
ISAIAH 8:9-10 “Associate yourselves, O ye people, and ye shall be broken in pieces; and give ear, all ye of far countries: gird yourselves, and ye shall be broken in pieces; gird yourselves, and ye shall be broken in pieces.10: Take counsel together, and it shall come to nought; speak the word, and it shall not stand: for God is with us.”
FOR CHILDREN
ISAIAH 8:18 “Behold, I and the children whom the LORD hath given me are for signs and for wonders in Israel from the LORD of hosts, which dwelleth in mount Zion.”
ISAIAH 10:1-4 “Woe unto them that decree unrighteous decrees, and that write grievousness which they have prescribed; 2: To turn aside the needy from judgment, and to take away the right from the poor of my people, that widows may be their prey, and that they may rob the fatherless!:3: And what will ye do in the day of visitation, and in the desolation which shall come from far? To whom will ye flee for help? and where will ye leave your glory? 4: Without me they shall bow down under the prisoners, and they shall fall under the slain. For all this his anger is not turned away, but his hand is stretched out still.”
ANOINTING SERVICE PRAYERS
ISAIAH 9:4 “For thou hast broken the yoke of his burden, and the staff of his shoulder, the rod of his oppressor, as in the day of Midian.”
ISAIAH 10:27 “And it shall come to pass in that day, that his burden shall be taken away from off thy shoulder, and his yoke from off thy neck, and the yoke shall be destroyed because of the anointing.”
ISAIAH 25:1-5 “They that trust in the LORD shall be as mount Zion, which cannot be removed, but abideth for ever.:2: As the mountains are round about Jerusalem, so the LORD is round about his people from henceforth even for ever.:3: For the rod of the wicked shall not rest upon the lot of the righteous; lest the righteous put forth their hands unto iniquity.4: Do good, O LORD, unto those that be good, and to them that are upright in their hearts. 5: As for such as turn aside unto their crooked ways, the LORD shall lead them forth with the workers of iniquity: but peace shall be upon Israel.”
PSALM 127: 3-5 “Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. 2: It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep 3: Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. :4: As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.5 Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.”