LIVING SINGLE IS A SERIOUS GIFT

• EVERYONE WANTS TO RUSH INTO MARRIAGE.
• MANY BELIEVE THAT ALL THEIR PROBLEMS WILL BE SOLVED ONCE THEY ARE MARRIED.
• MANY HAVE IT IN THEIR THINKING THAT THEY WILL NOT BE COMPLETE UNTIL THEY FIND THE PERFECT ONE CHOSEN FOR THEM.
• TRUE THERE SHOULD BE SOMEONE WITH WHOM ONE CAN SHARE THE INNER THOUGHTS, DREAMS, FEARS AND DESIRES, BUT BEING SINGLE SHOULD NOT BE SEEN AS A CURSE
• MANY EVEN BELIEVE THAT THEY CAN NEVER BE COMPLETE IN MINISTRY EXCEPT THEY BE MARRIED.
• HAS IT EVER OCCURRED TO YOU THAT GOD MAY CALL YOU WITHOUT NECESSARILY CALLING YOUR SPOUSE INTO FULL-TIME MINISTRY?
• IF YOU DOUBT THAT CHECK THE LIVES OF THE APOSTLES
• WHERE HAVE YOU HEARD OF FIRST LADY PETER OR JOHN? ISAIAH 54:1-5 “Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD. 2: Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes;3: For thou shalt break forth on the right hand and on the left; and thy seed shall inherit the Gentiles, and make the desolate cities to be inhabited.4: Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more.5: For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.

• DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN GOD CALLED ABRAHAM ISAIAH 51:1-2 “Hearken to me, ye that follow after righteousness, ye that seek the LORD: look unto the rock whence ye are hewn, and to the hole of the pit whence ye are digged.2: Look unto Abraham your father, and unto Sarah that bare you: for I called him alone, and blessed him, and increased him.
• WHY DO YOU THINK THAT ONLY A MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP CAN BRIDGE ALL THE GAPS IN YOUR LIVES?
• IT IS MORE THAN LIKELY BECAUSE WE HAVE ACCEPTED SOCIETY’S INTERPRETATION OF WHAT IT MEANS TO BE SINGLE

BUT WHAT IS GOD SAYING ABOUT BEING SINGLE? MATHEW 19: 7-12

• “They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8: He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9: And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. 10: His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.11: But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.12: For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
• SINGLENESS IS NOT A DISEASE, IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU INCOMPLETE OR EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE OR ABNORMAL IN SPITE OF CONTINUAL REMINDERS FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS OF BIOLOGICAL TIME CLOCKS, WE SHOULD BEWARE NOT TO RUSH INTO ANYTHING.
• IF YOU GET MARRIED BECAUSE OF THE ABOVE REASON OR TO EASE YOUR FEELINGS OF LONELINESS, FRUSTRATION OR WORRY, BEWARE, YOU MIGHT END UP IN THE DIVORCE COURT.
• POOR UNDERSTANDING OF TRUE SINGLENESS ALWAYS LEADS TO PROBLEMS IN A MARRIAGE.
• YOU MUST APPROACH YOUR SINGLENESS FROM A MORE POSITIVE PERSPECTIVE.
• ACCORDING TO GOD, IT’S OKAY TO BE SINGLE BUT NOT ALONE GEN.2:18 “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

THE QUESTION IS WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE?

• TO BE SINGLE MEANS TO BE SEPARATE, UNIQUE AND WHOLE PSALM 139:14 “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
• WHAT IS IT THAT MAKES YOU, YOU? WHAT ARE YOUR UNIQUE ATTRIBUTES?
• IS IT THE WAY, YOU LAUGH DRESS OR LOOK?
• WOULD YOU LIKE TO LOSE THE QUALITIES THAT MAKE YOU UNIQUE AND DIFFERENT FROM ANYBODY ELSE? OF COURSE NOT!
• NO ONE IN THE WORLD WOULD EVER BE LIKE YOU.
• EVEN IDENTICAL TWINS DIFFER FROM ONE ANOTHER IN BEHAVIOR, THOUGHT PATTERNS, EMOTIONS AND UNDERSTANDING.
• YOUR EXPERIENCES AND GENETIC MAKE-UPS, MAKES YOU A UNIQUE AND PERFECTLY DIFFERENT INDIVIDUAL.
• THE SAME IS TRUE ON A SPIRITUAL LEVEL, WHEN YOU STAND BEFORE GOD, YOU STAND AS A SEPARATE AND DISTINCT INDIVIDUAL. MATHEW 22: 29-30, “Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God. 30: For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.
• 2 COR. 5: 9-10 “Wherefore we labour, that, whether present or absent, we may be accepted of him.10: For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.
• YOU MAY BE MARRIED OR EVEN BE AN IDENTICAL TWIN NONE OF THESE RELATIONAL TIES ESPECIALLY MARRIAGE CHANGE YOUR SINGLENESS BEFORE GOD
• YOU SHOULD THEREFORE NEVER HAVE A PROBLEM WITH SINGLENESS.
• IT IS THE BASIS FOR WHO YOU ARE AS A PERSON. IT IS THE BASIS FOR YOUR UNIQUENESS.
• SINGLENESS IS NOT A BAD, NEGATIVE OR UNHEALTHY STATE OF BEING.
• YOU MUST CELEBRATE YOUR SINGLENESS IN CHRIST. SEE IT AS A GIFT, A CALLING TO BE MUCH CLOSER TO GOD.
• AND NEITHER IS THERE ANYTHING TO BE SHAMED OF, RATHER, IT IS SOMETHING TO BE PURSUED BECAUSE IT HIGHLIGHTS YOUR INDIVIDUALITY AND UNIQUENESS. IT HIGHLIGTS GOD’S LOVE FOR YOU, ISAIAH 54:1-6 “Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD. 2: Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes; 3: For thou shalt break forth on the right hand and on the left; and thy seed shall inherit the Gentiles, and make the desolate cities to be inhabited.4: Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more.5: For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.6: For the LORD hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith thy God.”
• YOU ARE UNIQUE AND SPECIAL
• JUST LIKE EVERY KEY ON A RING IS UNIQUE AND CAN OPEN SOMETHING THAT THE OTHER CANNOT.
• THE KEYS DO NOT LOSE THEIR ABILITY WHEN THEY ARE PLACED ON A RING WITH OTHERS.
• NEVER ALLOW ANYONE IN MARRIAGE OR OTHERWISE TO DESTROY YOUR UNIQUE PERSONALITY
• WHEN A PERSON IS FORCED TO LAY ASIDE THEIR INDIVIDUALITY JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE MARRIED, PROBLEMS WILL ARISE QUICKLY. 1 PET.3:8, “Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: EPH.5:21-33 “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.22: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.23: For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.24: Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.25: Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26: That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,27: That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.28: So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29: For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31: For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.32: This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. :33: Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
• SUBMISSION IS NOT SUPPRESSION AND IT SHOULD BE DONE IN THE FEAR OF GOD, BY BOTH PARTIES.
• A MAN WHO LOVES HIS WIFE SHOULD NOT ALTER HER PERSONALITY OR THAT WHICH MAKES HER UNIQUE.
• NEITHER SHOULD A WOMAN SEEK TO ALTER THE MAN’S PERSONALITY.
• DON`T ENTER INTO MARRIAGE WITH A WRONG MINDSET!
• YOUR SPOUSE CANNOT MAKE YOU COMPLETE OR WHOLE.
• THERE IS A PLACE IN MAN WHICH ONLY AND UNIQUELY BELONGS TO GOD.
• ALL THE INSECURITY, OR INADEQUACY OR INFERIORITY YOU MAY FEEL CAN ONLY DISAPPEAR IN CHRIST. 2 COR.5:17 “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
• NO OTHER PERSON CAN MAKE THOSE FEELINGS DISAPPEAR
• IT WILL BE A TERRIBLE PRESSURE TO PUT ON ANOTHER HUMAN BEING IF THAT’S WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM MARRIAGE.
• NO ONE SHOULD MARRY UNTIL HE OR SHE IS COMFORTABLE WITH HIS OR HER INDIVIDUALITY IN CHRIST. IS.54:14 “In righteousness shalt thou be established: thou shalt be far from oppression; for thou shalt not fear: and from terror; for it shall not come near thee.”
• MAJORITY OF MARITAL PROBLEMS STEM FROM HUSBANDS OR WIVES WHO ARE YET TO SEE THEMSELVES AS UNIQUE, SEPARATE, WHOLE AND SECURE ONLY IN CHRIST.
• IN CHRIST YOU CAN NEITHER DISRESPECT NOR DISLIKE YOURSELF.
• WHEN YOU LOVE AND RESPECT YOURSELF, POSITIVE, AND LONG-LASTING RELATIONSHIPS WILL EMERGE FROM THERE.
• EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING THAT THEY DON’T LIKE ABOUT THEMSELVES. IT COULD BE PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL MENTAL OR SPIRITUAL.
• BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE CONDEMNED TO LIVE WITH THOSE NEGATIVE TRAITS. GIVE THEM TO CHRIST. ROMANS 8:1-2 “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.2: For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.
• RATHER THAN TALK OR THINK OR WORSE S TILL ENDURE CONDEMNATION FROM OTHERS ABOUT THEM, MAKE A LIST OF THEM AND PRAYERFULLY WORK OUT A CHANGE FOR THE BETTER.
• THE SECRET TO ENJOYING LIFE AS A SINGLE PERSON IS TO LOVE YOURSELF FOR WHO YOU ARE IN THE GOOD AND THE UGLY.
• BE CONFIDENT IN CHRIST AND ALL YOU NEED WILL COME YOUR WAY.

SINGLENESS ALLOWS YOU TO FOCUS ON THE THINGS OF GOD, WITHOUT ANY DISTRACTION. 1 COR.7: 7-15

• “7. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8: I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9: But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.10: And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.12: But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.13: And the wman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14: For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.15: But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
• MARRIED COUPLES ARE OFTEN DISTRACTED BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO FOCUS THEIR ATTENTION ON OVERCOMING DAILY CHALLENGES AND MEETING DEMANDS OF FAMILY MEMBERS.
• SINGLE PEOPLE; HOWEVER HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY TO MAXIMIZE THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
• THEY CAN BE MORE AVAILABLE FOR THE WORK OF THE FATHER. 1 COR.7: 20, 27-40
• AS A RESULT OF SPENDING TIME WITH GOD, YOU WILL RECEIVE DIRECTION AND GUIDANCE.
• YOU WILL BE ABLE TO RECOGNIZE HIS VOICE, SO THAT YOU CAN BE A BLESSING TO THE PERSON WHO WILL EVENTUALLY COME INTO YOUR LIFE.
• YOU WON’T BRING TO THE RELATIONSHIP A LOT OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE LIKE DEBT, STRIFE, INSECURITY, IMMATURITY AND UNFORGIVENESS OR OTHER NEGATIVE INFLUENCES.
• YOUR WALK WITH GOD WILL MAKE YOU SO SECURE AND MATURE THAT ONCE GOD LEADS YOU TO CHOOSE YOUR MATE, YOU WILL HAVE A BEAUTIFUL, HEALTHY AND WHOLE RELATIONSHIP AND ENJOY YOUR MARRIAGE.
• THEREFORE DON’T WORRY ABOUT BEING SINGLE, MAKE THE MOST OF IT, WHILE IT LASTS
• ESPECIALLY IF GOD IS GIVING YOU THE GIFT OF BEING WITH HIM FOREVER.
• IF YOU GET INVOLVED WITH A DRINKING PERSON WHO LACKS SECURITY, SALVATION AND FOUNDATION IN CHRIST, YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE TO CARRY THAT PERSON SPIRITUALLY, EMOTIONALLY, PSYCHOLOGICALLY AND EVEN JUST MATERIALLY.
• YOU COULD BE MARRIED TO A SERIOUS DISEASE!